I have never spend so much of a day in prayer as I have today.  And that has been a very good thing.

One thing I have come to realize that the more seriously you take your life in ministry the more prayer is needed.  And not just that you need more people praying for you, but you have more things to pray about.  Reliance on God grows, or it needs to grow with every step of spiritual maturity you take.  This is because with every step you take in spiritual maturity, the weight of responsibility grows and the greater will be the accounting for what you have done, or not done.  I think of Jesus’ story about the stewards, and the ones who were faithful were given more, but the ones who were not as faithful, even what they had was taken from them (Luke 19:11-27).

We have been working on developing a more consistent time to pray together, Cheryl and I.  It seems there is always something that gets in the way.  This morning, it was our 2 year old, Dannan, with the runs, tramping it all over the house.  We did manage to get through a bit of prayer time, but that sure was cause to be interrupted!

Then, once I got to work, I just felt the weight of that reality land on me.  We need protection from distractions to be consistent coming to God in prayer.  I need to be praying about praying!  How strange is that?  I determined to take time this morning and get on my knees.  My flesh was telling me I was wasting precious office time that I could use for my class I am teaching or a myriad of other things, but God is trustworthy and he wants more of me.   I prayed for my wife, and our unity; I prayed for my kids; I prayed for the core team we are trusting God for (that is beginning to form, by the way!  Keep praying!); I prayed for diligence in what I need to do; to be a better father; to be a better husband; it went on and on and in some cases seemed circular.  But it was healthy.

Then, today being Wednesday, Pastor Philip, Jason and I headed over to Cedar Grove for the Surrey Pastor’s Network prayer meeting.  The worship time was very special, I think in large part because when you spend good amounts of time in prayer, God can’t help but bring you onto his wavelength, as it were.  And when you are in alignment with God, worship becomes a truly awe-inspiring experience.  I just became overwhelmed with His majesty, to the point that as worship was ending, all I could do was repent of my own sinfulness, echoing the words of the prophet Isaiah,

In the year that King Uzziah died, I saw the Lord seated on a throne, high and exalted, and the train of his robe filled the temple.  Above him were seraphs, each with six wings: With two wings they covered their faces, with two they covered their feet, and with two they were flying.  And they were calling to one another:

“Holy, holy, holy is the LORD Almighty;
the whole earth is full of his glory.”

At the sound of their voices the doorposts and thresholds shook and the temple was filled with smoke.

“Woe to me!” I cried. “I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the LORD Almighty.”

I was just made aware of how much of what pained me was my own doing in one way or another.  I knew it but I didn’t… own it if you know what I mean.  And as we entered into prayer for each other, I found myself praying for things that I had forgotten in the morning, which nonetheless desperately needed prayer.

I cannot complain.  It has been good for my soul.  But I just thought I would share about another phase of God working on the project called Oliver Shane Edwards.

Here’s a bunch of quick thoughts.  I realize I have been a little sporadic lately.  Here’s what’s been shaking.

• Cheryl’s 30 as of yesterday!  She’s finally old!  Yay (because now I don’t feel so old)!  Or Boo (because I know nobody really likes to grow up too much)!
• I can only say that because she is unbelievably hot and nobody would guess her age.  Heh.
• Been watching Mark Driscoll’s latest sermon series.  Interesting.  I’d like to say that I am only watching it to learn other pastor’s preaching techniques and approaches, but I was also curious how he’d tackle the material in front of thousands of parishioners.  Turns out he’s pretty deft, which would explain that whole massive-mega-multi-campus church thing.  (Watch for forthcoming post on this subject)
• Been a little discouraged lately, like things are a bit out of control.  The word “conflicted” doesn’t begin to describe how I am feeling.  On the bright side, guys can compartmentalize, so I do get to turn it off for huge parts of the day, but when I am not concentrating on anything else, the feeling comes back.  I know it is coming from having way too much on the go.  I have to knock some things out.
• Been reading Austin City Life’s “Partners” document.  That has challenged me to think about the system Phil uses at Community of Hope and think about what I would do differently.  Lots to be said there.  (Watch for forthcoming post on this subject.)
• Been down with bronchitis (viral) for almost a week now.  I don’t think I’ve ever had bronchitis before.  Today was the first day in 5 days I have been able to sing in the car to my iPod.  That was a long time without singing.

That’s it for my quick update.  More on a couple of these soon!

I had some very nice feedback by two men I respect after I preached yesterday.  It was constructive and I appreciated it a lot.

But the most important feedback I had was from my wife.  She said, “In my eyes, you became a pastor today.”

Nothing else matters.  If she believes in me and God is with me, I can do anything.

Boundless has a good discussion about the predicament of singles in churches today.  We have some singles in our church and I have definitely had, at different times, opportunity to speak into their lives.  When I read this quote from a single guy having trouble with the reaction of his church to his situation, I started looking at it from the other side.

One single man, quoted in Julia Duin’s Quitting Church, talked about his experience of telling his small group that he wanted to get married,

I was rebuked by the elders because, according to them, the Bible says it is better to be single to serve God better. They, obviously, were married, and I didn’t understand, if they felt so strongly about being single, why they themselves weren’t single. When I would ask for prayer, I would get a lecture about being content, and was told I needed to stop focusing on self and serve God better.

From his perspective, he felt rebuked, or given pat answers.  Things like, “be content” and “focus on God” are hard for people to hear who have tugs on their heart, or have their biological clocks ticking loudly in their ears.  Yet, from my perspective, as a guy who had that tug on his heart pretty early (I started seriously looking for a wife at about 22), I have been there.  At the same time, I am now on the other side.  I have given that advice and had it rebuffed.  One gentleman got downright angry because what he heard from me and others was (again not actually what we said, but it was what he heard) to stop wanting a wife, and focus on God.

The thing is, I say such things not to be dismissive, but because that is exactly what had to happen for me to be blessed by a wife.  I recall vividly where my heart was at in the year before I met my wife.  I was dealing with a breakup, and was trying to figure out how to do things differently to avoid such events in the future.  However, it was not until I finally quieted my heart and made a decision, overriding my emotions, that I would strive to be content with God and build my relationship with him, that God opened up a door to meet my wife.  In fact, it wasn’t two weeks after I had a conversation with God, telling him how happy I was that it was just him and me right then, that I met her.  There was something that God wanted my heart ready for I guess.  That was my experience, which is why I dispense that advice.  Not as a put-off, but in hopes that God prepares them the way He prepared me.

So singles, give us all a break, eh?  We actually do mean well.  And sometimes advice isn’t what you want to hear, but what you need to hear.  Itching ears and all that.

I should say one last thing though.  I am not advising people who desire marriage to stop looking.  I believe there is a posture both physically, mentally, and spiritually that a person can be in, still looking for marriage, while being content in your heart with regards to pursuing God.  I think that is the place I was in.  I was still making efforts to meet people and expand my social circle.  I was still intent that any relationship I pursued with a woman could, potentially be one culminating in marriage.  But somehow it wasn’t at the forefront, and I was no longer letting it dictate everything.  There’s a difference there somewhere.  Maybe someone smarter than I can discern it.

No, not mine.

But another blogger friend, she put up a post considering whether it’s a bit too harsh to say divorce is wrong, or sin.  She has noticed that a lot of people take very harsh views of divorce, and wonders if things aren’t quite as black and white.

They never are.

However, I don’t think divorce is as grey as she does.  I replied with a discussion about the real problem when we consider “exceptional” divorce circumstances.  I’ll summarize for you here.

We all know that God hates divorce.  Why?   (more…)

Lots of good articles in my RSS reader this morning.  If you don’t have an RSS feed reader (even if you’re not a big blog fan) I recommend it heartily.  It condenses hours of blog surfing down to minutes.  If you ever came across websites or blogs that you thought you’d like to read more regularly but forget their address, or don’t get around to it often, RSS is for you.

I just got on the bandwagon, even though I’d surf by their sites frequently before.  But here are two three excellent links to links with good stuff from my RSS feeds:

• Church Planting Novice found a great article at Subtext with excellent tips for conversationally bringing up the Gospel.  No “Did you know you’re going to hell?” type transitions here.
• The Pyromaniacs took a break from picking fights to link to the Jollyblogger’s cautious thoughts about the nature of marital problems in general.  He contends that it would be better for Christian spouses to treat each other as enemies! How’s that for controversial?  Read it – he makes more sense than you think!
• Mark Driscoll’s blog talks this morning about the spiritual discipline of studying.  I was shocked by the reference to 2 Peter 2:15, as it is the lead verse for Awana (stands for “approved workmen who are not ashamed”).  This will definitely be a talking point for my next team meeting.  More specifically, I have a leader who is worried about whether he is capable of studying the Bible.  I need to meet with him individually I think, encourage him and see if we can overcome this concern.

Hope you find these as interesting as I did!

Either this is a sign of Shane and I being so connected that we know each other’s thoughts, or it is a sign that we don’t communicate. He just stole my topic for today’s blog entry. Now I have no idea what to write about.

I guess I’ll start rambling until I come up with something…

Looking at our blog today I was just struck by the difference in our writing styles. Shane loves words. There’s nothing wrong with being a word nerd. He loves to talk about books and theology while I am a relationship and feelings kind of gal. My blogs aren’t as long as his (don’t worry, that will change) and they definately don’t sound as scholarly. Maybe it is just my need to be casual and relational.

I guess our blogs demonstrate how we compliment each other. We do flip back and forth between who’s relational and who’s the scholarly type. In fact when one of us is having an off day the other is generally optimistic and calm. It never fails. So, our differences compliment each other as you’ll see over time.

As Shane mentioned we are doing Awana. Right now I am doing the budgeting for that. I’ve been going through the catalogue trying to piece together what startup materials we’ll need and estimate what our costs will be for the year. I’m used to budgeting for our personal finances but when it comes to church money, I’m feeling my anxiety level rising. I want to be absolutely sure that I am ordering what we need when I’m not 100% sure what we need. Thank goodness Awana has missionaries who we can consult with and help us prioritize our supplies.

This Thursday we will be meeting with our Awana team for the first time, clarifying roles and getting them excited about what the Fall will look like. I am hoping I’ll be able to bake some tasty treats for our leaders. Treats might be a good incentive for them to stick around…

Shane was a boy from the Edmonton area, just moved to the coast to follow his roots and keep a promise to God that he would take Bible College for a year.  He liked the outdoors, but also computers.  He joked before he left Alberta behind that he was “going to the coast to meet his wife”.  It turned out it wasn’t a joke.

Cheryl was a girl who grew up on the coast.  She’d been an award-winning vocalist as a child, and had been to film production school.  Her family had run a BBS so she too was a computer person.  She had grown up helping her mother with special needs foster children in their home.

We met on the internet in October, 1997.  By Christmas we were engaged.

In the summer of 1998, we got married.  She thought she was going to be a nurse.  He thought he would work in Forestry.

In 2000, we had our first child, while she was in her 3rd year of University.  He decided to change careers to computers.

In 2003 we went to Mexico.  We both realized we never wanted to vacation on the backs of 3rd world poverty.

In 2004 He nearly quit his job, but realized that God was teaching him something.  He decided to stick it out.

In 2005 we decided to go on another trip, but this time to do something to serve God while we enjoyed someplace warm.  We didn’t leave until 2006 – to Rwanda.  We didn’t realize it, but that changed everything.

Upon returning from Rwanda, we met a couple of church planters.  We ignored them until the fall, when Shane met with them for the first time.  He tried to get Cheryl interested, but she said no.  Two months later, out of the blue, Cheryl asked to meet them too.  We joined their nascent planting core and began our education of what a church plant is.  In 2007 that core grew to forty by the end of summer.  Community of Hope launched September 9, 2007.

By early 2007, we recognized that God wanted more from us than floating along wherever life takes us.  We decided to aim our lives for something – planting a church of our own in five years.  We are now on that journey – walking with an open hand, waiting for God to take the lead.

God has lots of work ahead of us to prepare us for this.  We have skills and gifts, but no experience.  But that too will be brought to us with time.  Join us on our journey.  Subscribe to the blog via RSS or via email updates (see sidebar).  Encourage us along the way in the comments.  But most of all, if you feel God calling, use us to begin your journey.  We will add resources and information as we find it to help those who come after us.

God bless you on your journey.